My last article in my 7th House planets series was Venus. So, it seems appropriate for me to now tackle Venus’ feisty significant other, Mars. These two planets are like sugar and spice. If Venus is everything is nice, then Mars is, well, a bit of a handful. What does having Mars in the 7th House mean, then? Well, as I say in all of these 7th House planet articles, my personal theory on planets here is not exactly that they make the person co-dependent. It’s just that the person often can’t fully express that planet without receiving that same energy back from the other person, whether it’s a romantic partner, a friend, a relative, a co-worker, whoever else.
So, with Mars in the 7th House, that back and forth can become like a sparring match, for better or for worse. Planets in the 7th define our influence on people in one-on-one relationships. So, those with a 7th House Mars have a social influence that’s sort of like a punch on the arm. In fact, these people might frequently punch you on the arm. Mars is energizing, invigorating, passionate. It’s like a shot of adrenaline. Therefore, this is what these people are like in their relationships. They force you to go toe-to-toe with them, putting your money where your mouth is.
Now, this can go one of two ways. With some 7th House Mars folks, this might be perfectly harmless and good-natured. These people are energized by other people. When you’re around them, they want you to bring out their aggressive, competitive side. This is just the way they relate to people. So, that member of your family who suddenly lights up whenever the games get pulled out after Thanksgiving dinner or the guy at the college party who is the most enthusiastic about playing beer pong might have Mars in the 7th House. They want to be able to prove themselves against you but that doesn’t necessarily mean they want to rip your throat out.
On the other hand, Mars can represent how we can get too aggressive. So, it’s not uncommon for those with Mars in the 7th to be too pushy, too competitive, or too hot-headed with other people. It’s very different from a 1st House Mars, who usually just attacks new situations or their environment, in a way that only concerns themselves. 7th House Mars, when unbalanced, can have a habit of attacking other people. But, the kicker is that they also might be very likely to blame it all on you. After all, you made them mad. You made them do it! Mars also symbolizes what pisses us off and when you have Mars in the house of relating, other people can just easily piss you off.
And this is where the 7th House becomes a funhouse of mirrors. Since planets in the 7th often demand other people to be that planet, the blame can get shifted to the other person. Nowhere is this more visible than with Mars, as the 7th House doesn’t typically like conflict. So, a person with this placement can believe that everyone’s pushing their buttons all the time. Yet, they might not also realize that their aggressive behavior is what’s pushing people’s buttons and those people’s responses end up pushing their buttons. Confusing? Of course. Mars isn’t typically comfortable in the 7th House, often times because it can’t assert itself as freely as in other houses. It’s not a hopeless placement, though. But, it’s often a placement that symbolizes lots of displacement.
With Mars in the 7th, you might depend on the aggressiveness of others in order to be aggressive yourself. Therefore, keeping company that is passive, inactive, and non-competitive can really stifle the expression of your dynamic spirit. You are encouraged by the expression of other people’s Mars, allowing your Mars to rise to the surface. Yet, you feel rather depressed around those who don’t measure up. This is a placement that might often judge other people for not being strong enough for them. But, while lacking someone who’s strong and dynamic themselves, you might not seem all that formidable, either. So, just who is the weak link in the relationship?
Basically, you have to tell a planet in this house that “you complete me”, instead of looking for someone else to complete that planet. Since we’re talking about Mars, you have to develop an independent sense of your own drive and aggressiveness. Much like Saturn in the 7th, those with Mars in this house can sometimes feel lost and unmotivated without a strong, goal-oriented person in their life. So, you have to know what you’re bringing to the table, first and foremost. You have your own goals, desires, and passions. Just follow them completely and trust that you’ll attract likeminded individuals your way.
At this level, you can be quite a force to be reckoned with in your relationships. 7th House Mars people hold a sway over others that is rather dominating, even in a positive sense. You can dominate them with your motivating, exciting energy. Things get going when you’re around. In fact, you might not be very fond of just sitting around and doing nothing with other people. You may not have a problem at all being by yourself and doing nothing. However, when you’re with someone else, you want to be where the action is. Relationships are seen as opportunities to tackle challenges and just do things, though the nature and intensity of these activities will depend on the Mars sign.
You can run a marathon, so to speak, much better with someone by your side. Still, you don’t want to be the one doing all the legwork. The 7th House is all about balance, after all; a tit for tat kind of exchange. So, you want someone who can sweat and labor just as much as you do. In fact, Mars in the 7th House is usually going to test the other person and see how they can stand up to them. If they can’t push back effectively, you’re not interested. But, if they give as good as they get, then you’re in. For this reason, you enjoy some healthy arguing in your relationships. Maybe not to a dysfunctional degree. But, you don’t see a need to relate to people in such a super-smooth way. Unlike Venus in the 7th, always being nice and getting along doesn’t exactly satisfy you.
Another interesting thing is that Mars also rules the sexual drive and desires. Now, how is this going to affect your personal relationships? Well, when it comes to romance, in particular, if there’s no regular sex, there’s just no deal for you. You’re horniest when in a relationship, ironically, and when a physical disconnect kicks in, you’re not going to be a happy camper. But, even outside of romance, there’s still a certain sexual charge in many of your relations. While I believe 7th House Venus people merely like to flirt with and sexually tease many of their friends and associates, you’re more likely to just go all the way. Now, that’s not to say that you’re sleeping with everyone that moves. But, if you’re horny and the other person’s reasonably attractive and up for it, you probably won’t hesitate (and yes, of course, that goes for both men and women with this placement).
The logic behind it all is that you’re so eager to act on your sexual desires (Mars) with another person (7th House). That sounds like an obvious statement. Sure, most people are. Yet, your sexual side doesn’t feel complete while enduring a dry spell. Prolonged periods of not getting laid can be downright painful for a lot of 7th House Mars people, making you worry if you still even have a pulse. So, when the opportunity arises in a relationship, you’re very likely to just jump on it, pun intended, unless some strong Virgo or Scorpio influences are emphasizing discernment or self-control in your nature. Still, Mars is our masculine side; the side of us that just wants to “get it.” So, Mars in this house consistently needs a roll in the sack with someone or it feels out of whack.
For this reason, romance relationships might not start off very sweetly or sentimentally for people with this placement. A romance might usually begin with that morning-after breakfast, which is often fine by them. A hot collision of mutual passion is the best way to begin a love affair for a 7th House Mars person. But, it needs to stay passionate. This is why these people tend to end up with forceful, assertive, dynamic partners. The relationship needs to stay exciting and challenging, as well as remain a little heated, as well. Why? Because of the awesome make-up sex, of course.